The lesson of goodness
Children's first training begins in their home because when they are born it is like a blank sheet of paper. It is the parents who give this blank food with beautiful colors as the colors fill their personality. According to him, it will take four moons in his personality.
If his blank paper fills his brain with ugly colors, then his personality will be just as ugly. Millions of children will be sent to good schools but it has to be influenced mostly by the home environment. It is both good and bad. Children who are raised in a joint family system are trained and educated in a way that does not confuse them with their parents under one roof in a separate home.
Parents follow what they say, both good and bad.
If the parents tell their son not to lie, it is a big deal. Takes
There are also children who feel deprived and whose parents have divorced and remarried. When a child goes to his father's house, his mother is not there and when he goes to his mother's house. He resents his father because a non-man is not his father.
They grow up in a boarding house or grandparents' house for the feeling of deprivation. Their training becomes intensive. The feeling of deprivation grows day by day. Parents resort to psychiatrists but to no avail. Some children grow up in a joint family system. Everyone there tries to train the child in their own way.
In this regard, I am narrating a true incident which a woman told me.
The woman began to tell me that I live with my mother-in-law and sister-in-law. I want to educate my children in an Islamic way. I want to make them aware of the sins and rewards and the rules of Allah and the Islamic principles, but what can I say about the difficulties I have to go through to do so.
One day the child took ten rupees out of the money kept in the drawer and put it in his bag without my permission. The next day he was also taking the money and putting it in the bag in the same way that I saw. Although it is quite small. And yet he does not have such an understanding of the reward of sin, but I want to train children from now on so that they can learn to distinguish between good and evil.
From now on, let it be ingrained in their minds that they have to avoid sin at all costs. So I interrupted him and told him, "Son, don't take money like this. Ask your mama." Taking it in this way angers Allah and it is a sin.
He asked, looking with innocent eyes.
"What is sin?"
"Son, taking such stolen money makes Allah angry and punishes the child. Therefore, everything should be asked from Mama. If you needed money, I would give it to you."
It is not a sin to ask without asking. ”
When I said this, he promised that he would tell everything to Mama and if he needed money, he would not steal but would ask Mama so that there would be no sin. Saying this, he went to his uncle's room. And he told her the whole story and said,
Aunty replied lovingly. "Repentance. Your mother is very strict. She talks about sin and reward with her child so much. That money belongs to your father's earnings." What is sinful in this? Allah will not give any sin, children are innocent.
The innocent child was strangely disturbed to hear all this. He could not understand who was saying the right thing. On one side was his mother who was teaching him another lesson and on the other side was his aunt who was telling him the exact opposite.
Then my son entered the room and he said in a strange tone.
"Mama, you are very scared. Children are innocent. Allah will not punish us."
I sat him down and asked him the whole thing. When he told me that my aunt had told him all this, I shook my head and sat down.
But the effort has continued. Think for yourself, there are so many people in a house, they have advantages but also disadvantages. The child becomes the owner of a dual personality. I still explain good things to my son and avoid bad things I stop, but it often happens that he speaks in response to my principles in such a way that I am amazed to hear him, I am amazed to hear his words.
But then I keep doing my duty thinking that inshallah good will soon overcome evil and my child will also understand what is evil and what is good.
The woman was right. She was in a very difficult situation.
She herself wanted to teach the children to distinguish between good and evil with certainty. What is sin and what is the reward? She wanted to make them think, but in her own house the children were being taught a different point of view. There are also advantages, many difficulties and problems are easily solved.
Parents who raise their children separately also face problems. The best solution is to deal with these problems wisely and not lose patience.